Perception v. Reality

There is a definite gap between what we think and what is real.  This is the "Perception v. Reality Gap."  Bridging this gap will help us be more in tune with ourselves and reality.  It will help us have a more realistic picture of our world .

Here are a few examples of the gap:  "When I was a kid we used to get monster snows every year."  Since we are digging out from "Winter Storm Jonas" (when did we start naming snow storms) here on the East Coast this is a popular topic right now.  Most weather people (who have access to all kinds of records and data) claim this is one of the 5-10 biggest snow storms on record.  Yet I hear many people claiming that it used to snow like this every year when they were growing up.  Clearly there is a gap between the perception of past winters and actual, real past winters.

Another example that drives me up the wall is when people say "kids nowadays don't behave like they used to" or "parents nowadays don't raise their kids well anymore."  No data on this one, but I can remember that when I was growing up I heard the same things being said and I am still hearing it.  I bet a hundred years ago some kids were disrespectful and troublesome, just like 50 years ago and 20 years ago and today.  However, I have met some really talented and exceptional teens and young adults.  Are they perfect?  No, certainly not, but are they as a group completely out of control?  No.  Don't idealize the past.

How it affects you as a Leader, Coach and Teacher:

Close down the gap and be more even keeled and self-confident.  When I coach and my team wins I feel like a  championship coach and that Coach K could learn some stuff from me.  When my team loses I sometimes feel like I should hang up the whistle and just play video games.  If I teach a great lesson at church  and have a ton of kids show up my spirits are lifted and I feel like Billy Graham, John Wooden and Joel Osteen.  When only a handful of kids show up or my message flops and the game time is lackluster I feel lower than low.  I doubt I am the only one who rides this emotional roller coaster.  The difference between winning and losing is slim.  Maybe a couple kids got sick or had extra homework.  I am not great because my team scored a few more points or extra kids came to Youth Group.

Take pride in your preparation and execution, not in your results.  Focusing on who you are and how you are doing your work will allow you a more right frame of reference.  Close down the gap between perception and reality.  You are not great if a few things bounce your way and you are not pathetic if a few things go wrong.

****Short story in example:  A few days ago my basketball team trailed 30-12.  We made a few adjustments, settled down and quickly took a 46-43 lead.  Was I pathetic as a coach when we were losing 30-12 and then all of a sudden a genius when we had a 34-13 run.  NO, to both.  Sometimes things will go your way, sometimes they won't.  Don't allow the results to dictate your perception of reality.  Focus on what you do and leave the results come as a result.